Wednesday, 12 July 2017

Mentally Terraforming: Tanks but no Tanks (AAR)

 I admit this game has been a strange one to write up what with the prologue being split over the previous two posts (Down the bottom of this one and the whole of this one). However 'normal' service is about to be resumed as bellow is the whole bloomin' report and also the details of the scenario i made up and played!. This is also a bit of a first for me as its the first documented ding dong between Verland and the Guilds, which has been in the offing in my mangled brain for quite some time!.

The scenario
  As the prologues suggest the game is set in the disputed state of Arradan in one of the many areas of no mans land that lay within its borders. A run away experimental Steam tank made by the Guilds has come to a stop and is stranded between two advancing forces intent on capturing it for their own ends!. The object of the game is to lay claim to the stricken tank and to drive off the enemy.

The rules
 deployment: The opposing forces set up on opposite table edges according to the normal deployment rules. I used the basic Kings of War rules by mantic but whatever rule set you are using as long as the armies are set up on  opposite table edges with a good area of open ground between the two.

 The tank: The steam tank needs to be placed in the middle of the table an equal(ish) distance between the two forces. It is well and truly broken. The crew of the tank are inside trying to bodge anything they can to get it moving again. To represent the attempted fix the Guild player may roll 1d6 at the end of his turn and consult the table below to see if the crew have managed to do anything!.

             1D6 roll                     Result
              1-4                            No luck!, the tank is still broken.
                5                              Fixed the cannon!, the tank itself is broken but the cannon is fixed, It
                                               counts as a cannon with a 360 degree field of fire that the Guild player
                6                             Bodged it!, The tank may move up to 3 inches per turn and may turn up
                                               to 90 degrees before moving. The cannon is still broken unless you have
                                               rolled a 5 in a previous turn.

  The tank may not charge into combat and may not fight in any way. If it is fixed in any way the opposing Verland troops may attack it as normal. It has 1d6 hits (determined at the start of each  attack) and counts as having heavy armour (whatever that is in the system you are using, its Wronghammer, bodge it!).  Should any attacking enemy reduce the tanks hits to zero it counts as broken again and will loose the cannon and/or any movement it may had gained.

Winning: The Verland force wins if it manages to get 1 unit of unengaged troops within 5 inches of the tank at the end of the game with no Guild forces within 5 inches of the tank. Any other result is a win for whichever force kills the most enemy troops.

The forces: I used 1500 point forces for each side to give a large(ish) game. Feel free to use any size you like. Its your game after all!


Rear left to right: Pike horde, Militia horde, Pole-arms horde.
Front left to right: Crossbow regiment, General Fallac on Quentin the great eagle (counts as General on winged beast), Scout sargent Fitzerran (counts as a Hero), Crossbow regiment.

From left: Border guard regiment (mounted sargeants), Royal Guard horse regiment (count as Knights with elite), Verland Knights regiment.

The verland force are based on red and white bases and are made up of minis by Red box, Mini art and Strelets.


From rear: 2 Cannon, Commander Allran (general on horse), Pike and shot horde (a pike horde with the Ra and Special of an Arquebusier regiment).
Front: Enforcer regiment (count as foot guard with the Ra and Special of an Arquebusier troop), Pike and Shot horde (see above), Swordsmen regiment (count as shield wall).

From left: Two Guild lancer regiments (count as Knights)

The Guild forces are based on Red and Yellow bases. The force is made up of minis by Zvesda, Ceaser, Revell, A call to arms and Red box.


Another quiet day in the peaceful wastes of Arradan. (photo taken from the Arradan tourist board archive).


The center with the stricken Steam tank in the middle, Verland to the Left and the Guild force on the right.

                                              The Verland battle line ready to attack!

The Border guard and Royal guard ready to sweep the right flank.

                           Crossbows and Knights watch the left ready to spring into action!.
                             In response the Guild forces form a gun line in the center.

The horse prepare to take high ground on the flank.

The swords form a reserve to warn off any attempt to turn the gun line.
  The Guild horse waste no time and advance as far as they can on the Guild left ready to take the hills overlooking the tank.
In the center the guns roar.....targeting the unfortunate Militia!, the whole gun line pour shot after shot into the volunteer troopers!. Their nerve almost deserting them they just about hold on but are wavering, remaining in a disordered state!.

Hearing the thunder of hooves in the ruins the Swords advance to cover the flank.
In response the Verland line attempts to push forward, however the disordered Militia block the Pole-armed troops path meaning only the Pikes and the hero can get forward!.
Not exactly a steady advance!.
On the Verland left the General and Knights advance to cut off the Guild Lancers. The crossbows on the hill open fire. On the other flank the Verland horse prepare to charge!.

'Prepare to Charge!!!!, mind the dice!!!'
Seeing the Verland pike advancing the Guild guns roar!, The pike take a pounding but hold fast!.

On the flank a Lancer regiment charge the Verland knights while the other regiment advances on the hill.
The crunching charge of the Lancers causes the brave Verland Knights to rout!.

On the opposite flank the Verland horse smash aside the Guild swords. In the center the Militia finally restore order in their ranks and advance freeing up the Poles to also move towards the steam tank.

The crossbow regiments re-position themselves to fire on the Guild lancer regiments damaging both!.
New Verland smokey crossbows in action!.
(I classed the Verland missile troops as crossbows to make them less powerful than their opposite numbers as both forces have black powder but the Guilds are more advanced in its use!)
.Seizing his chance while the Missiles rained down on the lancers General Fallac drove Quentin into the flank of the closest enemy regiment.....

Causing no damage whatsoever!!!.
In response the Lancers pivoted and crashed into the Great eagle destroying it and its rider!. The other Lancer regiment charged up the hill into the crossbows who although badly damaged stand in the face of the onslaught!.
On the left the Enforcers and a cannon turn to fire at the Horsemen sweeping around the ruins but failing to stop the advance.
The main gun line continue to pour fire into the advancing enemy. The pike again get the worst of it and eventually rout!.
Inside the Tank the crew finally manage to fix the cannon!, Much whooping and backslapping can be heard from the machine, confusing all that hear it!.
The rout of the Pike horde left the Verland center weakened so the Pole armed troops made for the Steam tank and charged it but fail to do enough damage to break it again.
The horse charge headlong into the cannon and smash it to splinters!

Things take a turn for the worst for the Verland force as the Lancers charge the crossbows again wiping them out leaving the left in the hands of the Guild horse, the other lancer regiment double back towards the tank.
In the center the Pike and shot horde break ranks to attack the Militia routing them too!.

And worst of all the Enforcers throw themselves at the Royal guard horse busy smashing the cannon but do minimal damage.......
......but when the Royal guard test to rout they roll a double 6!, automatic rout!. The Verland forces loose 3 units in one turn!. TThen the crew in the tank manage to fix it again meaning it can now move and fire!!.
The Verland Border guard charge the victorious Enforcers but fail to do much damage. The pole armed horde charge the Tank again damaging it enough to undo all the good work of the crew, who can be heard sobbing and cursing in equal measure!.
'I think its the boiler!'
Seeing the battle go against his side Scout sargeant Fitzerran chooses to try to regain some momentum for his troops and charges the closest Pike and shot horde!.......Because hes not cleaver!.
'aaarrrrggghhhhh!!!! WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING!!!!?????!!!!'
Not surprisingly he failed to do enough damage to rout them!. With the battle drawing to a close the pike and shot horde charged Fitzerran back but failed to do any damage!. A regiment of Lancers move closer to the tank in order to contest it as an objective. The last action of the game of note saw the Verland Border guard rout the Enforcers but it was too little too late!
The battle draws to a close.
At the end the tank lies between the Verland pole-arms and the Guild Lancers, the Verland force is all but broken and so is forced to withdraw without their objective. Once again the Guilds have proved that their superior fire power and training win out over tradition and heart!. 

Well that was alot of pictures!. I may move away from the Mentally Terraforming stuff for a bit. I have big plans for the next post.....something about a challenge.....i seem to recall some quotes somewhere along the line....... I just hope it comes together quicker than the saga detailed above!!.

Anyhow, thank you for taking the time to read this chapter of my silly little corner of the interweb....till next time!.....


  1. Great battle! Blooming great eagle fails to do any damage - great fun.

    1. Thanks Mr Tar!. I expected more from Quentin i must say, he let the side down in a big way! (Considering in KoW a flank attack doubles your attacks!).

  2. I can see the tabloid press now...'Verland Knights in rout Shock!'

    Quentin the Eagle rocks by the way, and the battlefield ruins really look the part.

    For some reason, the steamtank reminds me of Ivor the Engine...but in a good way :) ...psssht-koo pssssht-koo

    1. The knights were very unlucky indeed and i think that rout was the final nail in the verland coffin so to speek!. Quentin was a find by my son, 3 for £1 in a tat shop so you will be seeing his brothers soon!. I love the steam tank but it is a bit too cute to be considered a true killing machine!. Perhaps it needs a name?, any thoughts?.

    2. Right, so Ivor is too obvious.
      'Ripley' is too way out there...
      How about 'Winona'?

  3. Replies
    1. All are kinda cool, i'm thinking a girls name because its got to be a she. Winona is good. I love the idea of a cute name followed by...'ran over the already fleeing enemy troops while here cannon roared!'

    2. Winona the Steam Tank packed her trunk
      And said goodbye to the Regiment,
      Off she went with a thunkety thunk,
      Thunk, thunk, thunk

    3. Of course there are also several period names to consider:
      Eva von Steam

  4. Ooooh i like Gertrude, she has the look of a Gertie dont you think?. 'Come on now Gertie lets scrub the blood and innards off your wheels and buff you up good as new, we'll 'ave you back out lookin yer best and squashing the enemy like tubes of toothpaste lickety split!' said Gunther the head engineer. 'Toot toot' replied Gertie the gigantic steam powered killing machine, she loved running down fleeing troops best of all!. What a wonderful day it would be don't you thing children?'.
    Taken from the Guilds own childrens tale 'Gurtie the jolly good engine of bloody death'.

    1. The 'Gurtz' has it then.
      Of course you might have to break tradition and apply paint now ...a stylised 'Gertie' painted on the side, with a WW2 style babe on a steam engine?

  5. Thats kinda how i picture it too, like a ww2 us bomber. Im very sure if i attempted that i could completly spanner it up worse than a near sighted 3 year old!.