' Come on there youngn' i gots a thurst on that'd make chalk weep, wheres that tankard!. Ah there we arre....'ang on, you never lets ol' Gibby gob in im again did ya?. No?, i hopes not 'ees a roight ol' swine that barkeep...still scrumpies cheep an the stools don't ave too many splinters so ee cant complain none can ee?. Right now sis yer backside down i's got a tale for ee. You ever 'erd of tha battle of the Barm?...no?, what do they's teach you youngn's these days?!. Right time for an' ed...youcay...an..educay....oh, some o' that learnin stuff. Roight gets yer selve comfey......
It was ooooh abouts 'undred year ago or some such, King 'Arrold the fisculy corrupt was on the big gol' chair an ee was doin a grend ol' job o' pissin' off the people an no mistake. Eee taxed everythin'; Doors, door knobs, door frames, door micees, all fruit that hung offa trees, all veg what growed under groun', candles, daylight, nostrils, knees, earlobes, folks wi'out ears, thumbs...ee taxed thumbs an' most other stuff between an' besides. As im sure yous can fathom eee were a touch on the unpopular side wi' all class o' folk. Then when they thought eee ad nothin' left to tax ee goes and comes up with the final bloomin' straw, eee taxes those wi'a regional accent!. Don' looks at me likes that, this actually occored it did, pappas youngest cousens great uncles sisters dad werr there!. An' i knows what yous gonna' ask: 'ooow did they knows ooo ad a regional accent?'. Well lets me enlig...enli...bloody tells you. Eeee sent some steward types to each village wi' an armed guard o' about fifty strong or some such, theys grab the first yokle lookin' type they can corner and hold out a blimmin' bread roll of all things. Then theys ask im...ai sword point i may adds....'my good man' all plummy and Crivenshirly like 'My good man', they says 'tell me what this is called!' The yokle type woulds tell them an' by the local name for it eee would use they would decide wethers eee 'ad a regional accent!. Don' look so confu...conf...all stupid at me, its a cleaver plan in its ol' way. See in posh ol' Crivenshire its a 'bread roll dontch' you know', them rogues from Offenhamme way would never falls for it so they were protected as per bloody normal, eer in Burkenshire way its a Bap an up in Fossestershire its a 'Barm cake'. So they would know where you comes from and use that as evidence. Bloody sneeky if you asks me!. Anyways, them stewards dooin all roight wi' this scheeme 'till it brings 'um to a village outside Pugglish Town up north in ol' Lummoxshire part o' Fossestershire. The local lordly type gets wind o' the new tax an gathers is men, ees 'ad enough o' not avin a pot to...well yous get me bloody meanin. 'Is men set about the Royal party an' sends em' all back down south, dead as a dodo wi' a stale Cob stuffed somewhere that dont be worth thinkin' too long about!. So it goes that this upsets the king, eee can't go lookin weak, if eee lets this stand the rest o' the lords will refuse to pay an' thattl' tear it an' no messin'. So eee sends an army up to Lummoxshire to put down what ees callin a rebel...rebelli..rebb..er....uprisin'!. Now more local lords ave joined up wi' the rebel types an' they gots an army o' theys own!. Now, this is all set to appen south o' Pugglish. If the rebels go an' wins the lords will go an' gets brave an' it could be a full scale civil war!, if the Kings lot wins it'l' put an' end to that all quick loike!'. Now on the day o' the battle...oh 'ang about will ee look at that, me tankards gone dry, be a good lad an pop to the bar will ya?, an' tell o'l grumpy chops to makes sure ee fills it this toime......'
This was a perfect opportunity for me to try out the new rules I'm working on and the freshly based minis i have put together. The battle features the (then) royal Forces of Crivenshire and the opposing forces of Fossestershire, mostly lords from the Lummoxshire region as it was back then. No special rules or conditions as its a test game but hopefully it will be fun anyway!.
The rebel forces of the lords of Lummoxshire in Fossestershire set up thusly:
On their right were a unit of regulars in a defensive position in some handy ruins, supported by a cannon.
The center was manned by a unit of Fossestershire Bills and a unit of dismounted Knights.
On the left a unit of irregulars ( the 'Banger Brigade' sponsored by the Frankly-wurst Sausage company) occupy the woods alongside some skirmishers and an allied group of Divertonshire giant Kestreleaglesparrow (KES for short) riders.
The royal forces comprised a left flank of some light horse and a steam tank (the s.s.Belching Bessie)
A center of Regulars and a cannon on a helpful hill supported by a unit of Irregulars (Sponsored by the east Rillingford knitting circle).
The right was made up of a wood full of skirmishers and a unit of Mounted Knights!.
Each side is based on their flag, this can be seen in the top corner of the set up photos (fossestershire are grey with a white cross, Crivenshire are half blue and white). For reference the red and white flag flown by most of the Fossestershire units is the flag of Lummoxshire.
THE SCUFFLE BEGINS!
The opening shots are fired by the Crivenshire skirmishers who fire a volley at the Banger Brigade.
Who having taken exception to this promptly turn and run!.
(Irregulars are rolled up at random at the start of the battle meaning some are better than others!).
The Crivenshire gun line give the advancing enemy a taste o' lead!.
The Crivenshire knights advance around the flank and are pounced on by the KES riders!.
On the Fossestershire right combined fire causes the light horse to leg (or hoof) it!.
The Fossestershire center moves to contact. The Billmen charging the Sewing circle irregulars.
Who hold and force the Enemy back!!.
A volley from the Skirmishers combined with a counter charge from the knights sees off the KES squadron!.
While the cannon and regulars unload into the Bills causing them to break!.
Despite drawing heavy fire 'Bessie' works her way around the defensive wall......
Then promptly runs over the cannon ('full steam ahead mr Bosun!!')
The knights charge the Crivenshire irregulars forcing them back but they refuse to break!.
But trouble looms from behind!.
The knights smash their opposite numbers!.
The view of the surviving rebels!.
And with that the rebellion was over!. A fun game that was one sided but that is more down to my lumpen tactics (on one side at least). The rules seem to fit the brief, being quick (the game played through in less than 1 hour), rewarding good tactics and keeping both sides interested (turns rely on a randomish activation system and immediate resolution of charges as they occur so both players are reacting throughout the game). Missile fire is powerful but their are rules for reloading and running out of ammo so its not 'all powerful' and you have to combine your fire and pick your moments to maximise its potential. Use of combining units in the field (i.e. firing with one or more units before charging the same target with another) is deadly but two units can have a fire fight or shoving match for quite a while if left to it (which seems to fit the period).
Anyway, nice to get another test done, i hope to have the rules written up by Christmas if time allows.....
......'till next time.....